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Doomsayers
Are
those who claim the world is about to end right?
We at SATA are the last people to advocate unnecessary scare-mongering,
but all the signs seem to suggest that the end of the world is nearly upon
us!
That
means there's very little time left for you to get your voice heard! Below
are just a few of the prophesies we've received from SATA Members and
other reliable souls.
If
you have something you'd like to tell us, send your email and CH to the
address at the bottom of this page.
Even if you're not a Member, please do write in too. And don't
hesitate to send in your picture while you're at it (optional)!
We
won't give your name or email address to any third party. Just tell us your
views and your
CH (cyber-handle: mine's X-Rom--at least until doomsday). If
you don't have your own CH, conjure one up today! Be sure to write it down
and keep it in a secure place, so you won't mislay it!
Now,
let's see what fate awaits us all!
| CH |
Doomsday
Vision |
| Linkus Dinkus
 |
"Here's how my suicide note
will read: 'I've been misunderstood for long enough, and now you all will pay!'" |
| Charm
Weezle
 |
"The
rapid growth of the computer virii horrifies us all, and believe you me
it is a sign of the verifiable end of the world that is not as far
off as predicted by Nostrademol and his ilk. What I mean is
clear. Computer expansion, spawned by the explosion of the
Information Superhighway, has rendered us all 100% reliant for our
very survival upon dangerous people like Bill Gates and Linux.
The virii, emananting from our former enemies the east Europeans and
the Philippine, detonate with devastation across our world networks
with terrifying frequency. With more and more of us connecting
up our toasters and fridges to the World Wide Web for remote
control, things are just going to stop working. Like you, I
keep my bread in my fridge to keep it fresh. With the virii my
fridge will run hot like an oven instead of cold like an icebox,
therefore spoiling my bread! But by that time it won't matter
at all because the toaster will already have been toasted
(get it?) by
the poisoned web code!! This is the precise moment when the mother
ship, angered that our virii have afflicted their microwaves, will strike and blow us to bits!!!" |
| Jan
Girl
 |
"Remember,
this is the Dawning of the Age of Aquarius! Let us all take special
heed of this stupendous moment! Let us forget our petty hatreds and
come together every man, every woman into the arms of true peace and
understanding! Look at yourself in that magical mirror and see the
contentment and tranquility bubble within your mind--take hold of
your brother's and sister's hands and dance the Eternal Dance! Oh,
carry me, dear child, into the life we are all meant to lead—down
the path of purity and high refinement! Nurture me against your warm
bosom, dear Mother—my planet, my earth, my home! Speak to me in whispers
your words of wisdom: Let It Be! Carry me down that River--the River
of Life, of Wholesome Posture, of Honest Abstinence! Protect me all
my days from the Lesser Things! Count me among your Esteemed Family,
whose Clarity exceeds all possible exaggeration! Be the Virtuous and
All-Encompassing Vehicle of my Everlasting Salvation!" |
| Loader
 |
"About
Armageddon: I don't think anything much will change, but I think we
may all become a bit nicer to each other, given the perhaps superstitious/perhaps
not fear that something big might actually happen. Until then, I've
decided to give up all citrus fruits, as I do rather enjoy them and
appreciate their contribution to my overall nutritional health (vitamin
C, as you may know), and abstinence means nothing after all, if you
don't abstain from something you enjoy or need." |
| 2K
Profit
 |
"With
Armageddon coming up very soon (sooner than any of us can really know)
we should really all be getting prepared. They say that forewarned
is forearmed and I'm here now to arm you all as best I can. With advice
on what to do. There are those who'll be drinking and celebrating
as they normally do and there are those who'll be waiting on mountaintops
for extraterrestrials or gods to descend upon them and sweep them
away to Paradise or Hell or Mars. But really what's going to happen
is this. The world is simply going to slow down its spinning and stop
completely and then start spinning in the other direction. This won't
affect the normal flow of time, but it will mean we all need to harness
ourselves to fixed objects such as lampposts or trees or parking meters
to keep from flying off into space." |
| Your
CH |
Your
Doomsday Vision |
CeTeRa
DeSuNt
Get in touch anytime at
Remember that address - It could just
save you from the Fiend - he hates abstinence!
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